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Orisa Lifestyle Activities: Week 13
An Offer You Can’t Refuse: It’s one thing to give someone a gift. It’s something else to make someone an offer. On one hand, a gift typically represents something that enhances the life of the recipient. For example, someone might give a book, a camera or a musical instrument as gifts that enrich the recipient in some form or fashion. Even natural gifts and talents, like artistic virtuosity, can be understood as things that add value to a person’s life. On the other hand, an offering is typically something that is given as a tribute or as recognition. Even when someone offers you a job, they are recognizing your unique qualities, skills and abilities. In this way, an offering implies reciprocity. Contrary to popular belief, however, an offering is NOT a purchase or a transaction. That is, you’re not saying “I give you THIS so now you have to give me THAT.” Instead, when you offer foods to the ancestors, for example, you are, in effect saying, “I offer you your favorite food while you are in heaven so that you will not allow me to want for food here on earth.” In the gesture of making an offering, you recognize the ancestors’ role as providers. And in doing so, you remind them how deeply you depend upon them, as a child depends upon his parents. This is what it means to make an offer they cannot refuse. This is true, not only of the ancestors, but also of people in general. That is, by offering people certain things, in the right way and at the right times, you activate the laws of reciprocity and interdependence. In the activity that follows, you will have a chance to practice making people offers that they can’t refuse:
Please complete the following:
KNOW: What are the five most important roles you play (e.g., mother, sister, niece, daughter, best friend)? How do you characterize those relationships, in terms what you give and what you receive? What do you need most from each relationship? What do the other people in these relationships need from you? What do you offer them? What do they offer you?
COMMIT: Identify one of those relationships that you wold like to develop somehow. If you could optimize that relationship by giving more AND getting more out of it, what do you consider the ideal way to do so?
PRACTICE: Organize a scenario through which you can give more and receive more from ONE of those relationships. Make note of what worked and did not work. Repeat this at least three times.
Please complete the following:
KNOW: What are the five most important roles you play (e.g., mother, sister, niece, daughter, best friend)? How do you characterize those relationships, in terms what you give and what you receive? What do you need most from each relationship? What do the other people in these relationships need from you? What do you offer them? What do they offer you?
COMMIT: Identify one of those relationships that you wold like to develop somehow. If you could optimize that relationship by giving more AND getting more out of it, what do you consider the ideal way to do so?
PRACTICE: Organize a scenario through which you can give more and receive more from ONE of those relationships. Make note of what worked and did not work. Repeat this at least three times.